I don't want to jinx this ... but it's now three days post chemo infusion and though I am a bit weak and woozy ... I am able to: put one foot in front of the other without falling down; eat small portions of food without getting queasy, sit in my backyard and watch my animals frolic, and most of the time speak in full sentences and actually make sense. Ah ... the simple things that we all take so forgranted. It sounds so trite, but I will forever more see life through a much different and, hopefully, more enlightened filter.
I was too jittery and fog-brained to do any writing yesterday or wednesday. Today is somewhat better, though my hands are still shaking.
I promised a definition of "chemo-brain" and here's one of the best I could find - from the Mayo Clinic:
Signs and symptoms of chemo brain may include:
- Being unusually disorganized
- Confusion
- Difficulty concentrating
- Difficulty finding the right word
- Difficulty learning new skills
- Difficulty multitasking
- Fatigue
- Feeling of mental fogginess
- Short attention span
- Short-term memory problems
- Taking longer than usual to complete routine tasks
- Trouble with verbal memory, such as remembering a conversation
- Trouble with visual memory, such as recalling an image or list of words
TWO YEARS! Lord help me and anyone around me if it takes two years to de-fog. :-)
So, dear friends, be patient with me. Under the healthiest and best of circumstances I realize that I often exhibit "chemo-brain" tendencies (who knew?!) ... now it's a magnitude of ... well if I could think of the word I'd tell you. :-)
One thing I do remember and will always remember is the love and support and comfort I continue to receive from all of you, my darling friends and family. I am extremely grateful.
3 comments:
I keep trying to post comments and nothing has posted....but I'll try again.....to let you know you are right here in the front of my brain - which is fogged, even without chemo brain. Fingers and toes crossed. I love the picture of you and your sister! You hang in there, Benita. I asked a friend who has been through almost the identical path as you, and she said the chemo brain passed much more quickly than the 2 year you mentioned. In fact, she said except for fatigue, she doesn't remember other symptoms. So it's individual I guess. The Arizona contingent of the Benita Kenn fan club - me being president - loves you, Benita.
Hi Benita-- I finally figured out how to post--at least somewhere you'll see it! By my calcs, food should be starting to taste normal-ish again, and you may even be toying with the notion of an adult beverage. Fair warning--more than a taste, not so good. My first post-chemo headache was this morning, after a full glass of vino last night:) Almost worth it though, to be in company of friends, in a lovely vineyard setting, on a beautiful evening.
Being Benita is the best cure! xoxo Sandra
Dear B-Woman...
We sang with you in our hearts last night. Hoping you'll venture forth to sing or bask with us Sunday. Anything I can do for ya?... I'm in and out of the 'hood.... Today is good... a stroll to Zoe? a provision run?.... Hugs and Prayers*.. Moi
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